Unique wedding ceremony ideas that will bring meaning to your special dayday
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5 minutes
Weddings are becoming increasingly more personalised, with many couples looking for their own ways to twist wedding traditions and bring their own touches to the standard formula. We unpack the unique wedding ceremony ideas that are rising in popularity, including handfasting, ring warming and group vows.
While interest in unique wedding ceremony ideas in the UK is rising, many suggestions actually have roots in ancient wedding rituals. Handfasting, for example, where the couple's wrists are bound with ribbon or cord to symbolise their union, is an ancient Celtic tradition, while ring warming is rooted in Irish culture. While these marriage customs have been carried out in communities for thousands of years, they are now becoming common additions to the traditional wedding format, as celebrant Rosalie Kuyvenhoven explains. ‘Couples realise they have the freedom to choose where, with whom and how they want to celebrate their love,’ she tells us. ‘Handfasting is a popular choice with couples I work with, as it gives a wonderful opportunity to personalise the meaning of the cords or ribbons and include family and friends.’
As a caveat, wedding planner and founder of Bluebird Creative Lauren Goodman suggests clearing any unique wedding ceremony ideas with the venue before starting to plan. ‘Research the alternative ceremonies available and make sure you chat with your planner or venue about them. Once you have found or decided on one, check how this looks for you as a couple and the venue, as well as any legalities,’ she advises. Currently, couples in England must recite specific marriage vows in an approved venue (such as a registry office or Church) for the wedding to be legally binding. But many couples opt to work with a celebrant on a follow-up ceremony, where the format can be more tailored and creative.
Unique wedding ceremony ideas
We asked a wedding planner and a celebrant to share the most unique and memorable ceremonies they’ve experienced during the hundreds of weddings they’ve worked on to inspire you to add some unique flourishes to the wedding ceremony formula. Our experts all noted how rituals that involve guests are particularly popular with a move towards recognising community as part of marriage.
Handfasting
Handfasting is an ancient Celtic tradition in which the couple's hands are bound together to symbolise their union - it’s this ritual that coined ‘tying the knot’. Kuyvenhoven cites this as a popular ceremony add-on for modern couples, particularly those wanting to include their guests. ‘At a recent wedding for a Chinese-German couple with a very international audience, we included a handfasting ritual with 14 ribbons. Each ribbon represented a different language or culture and was placed on the couple’s hands by a family member or friend who said a wish in their mother tongue as they presented their ribbon.’
Communal vow
A communal vow is typically where the officiant asks the guests to respond with ‘we do’ in a statement of support to the couple, such as promising to stand by them through challenges, have faith in their relationship, or simply enjoy the good times with them. The adage goes that it takes a village to raise a child, but the celebrant notes how this is also true of marriage. ‘I’ve seen couples opt to include rituals for family and friends to participate in and to honour them as part of the celebrations — it’s not just about the couple, it’s about community.’ She continued, ‘A communal vow is a simple yet powerful way to include family and friends. After the couple shares their vows and exchanges rings, the guests stand up and vow to continue to support the couple on their journey together.’
Choosing a close friend or family member to be the celebrant
After the legalities are out of the way, couples can choose whoever they wish to be the celebrant. ‘More and more couples are now opting for a friend or family member to be their celebrant - this is a lovely and personal touch as it means it is someone who really knows the couple. I did this for my sister's wedding, and it was such an honour - just one consideration: opt for someone confident speaking in front of crowds!’ Currently, no formal qualifications are required to become a celebrant in the UK for friends and family. However, plenty of guides online will help with training, and organisations like The Celebrant Collective offer free courses. For those pursuing it as a career, official courses are available with organisations such as Humanist UK.
Ring warming
Ring warming is an ancient Irish tradition in which the wedding guests bless the rings. ‘This is another way to make everyone feel included,’ Kuyvenhoven explains. ‘Traditionally, before the ring exchange, guests are asked to bless the rings by briefly holding on to them as they are passed around. Alternatively, instead of passing the rings around (which can take a lot of time, especially with many guests), the ringbearer can hold up the rings and present them to everyone while they send their happy thoughts and blessings. The rings are then infused with everyone’s love as the couple places the rings on each other’s fingers.’
A gift exchange
Bringing symbolic gifts into a wedding ceremony can be a romantic addition. ‘Gift giving symbolises the giving and receiving of their love together throughout their married life. It could be a more generic item, such as a rose, the symbol of love, or a more specific item. In a recent wedding, two brides decided to exchange a specially selected pebble as a nod to their favourite animal, Gentoo penguins, who use pebbles to affirm their love for their chosen partner.’ The guests could also receive small gifts instead of traditional wedding favours.
The Sand Ceremony
Also called a Unity Sand Ceremony, this new tradition between couples is thought to have been influenced in part by the Hebrew tradition of the Salt Covenant, where two pouches were combined to seal a deal or mark a relationship. Much like the Unity Candle Ceremony, where the couple light one candle together to mark their union, this wedding ritual plays on the idea of two becoming one. The couple pour sand from their individual containers into one vessel, which acts as a keepsake from the wedding. ‘The sand is usually from somewhere sentimental,’ Goodman tells us, explaining how this popular wedding ceremony idea ‘symbolises unity’.
The traditional wedding ceremony format
For many, these unique wedding ceremony ideas will not throw out the rule book entirely but add a personal touch to the existing ceremony format. Typically, the day will follow the below structure.
Introduction: A welcome from the officiant - celebrants can add personal touches to the welcome messaging that reflect the wedding style or tell guests more about the couple.
The procession: The bridal party enters - nowadays brides may be given away by either parent, another family member or friend. Some couples may opt to both walk down the aisle together as a symbol of unity.
Readings: Wedding readings take place - these could be traditional readings or modern wedding readings taken from books, films, music or contemporary poetry.
Exchange of vows: The couple share their declaration of love and vows - vows are becoming more and more personalised and could also involve guests making their own promise to the couple.
The ring ceremony: The ring exchange process is explained and carried out - couples can opt to ‘warm’ the rings with a blessing from guests.
The pronouncement of marriage: The couple are officially married - typically followed by ‘You may now kiss,’ though this isn’t an official part of the process.
The recession: The couple and the bridal party exit.
Unique wedding ceremony venue ideas
Finding a unique wedding setting is also a consideration for many couples, as well as unique wedding ceremony ideas. ‘I’ve worked on so many weddings it's rather hard to pick a favourite,’ William Bartholomew of William Batholomew Party Planning told us. ‘However, a Druid wedding at Avebury [Henge and Stone Circles] really stands out as unique. Madonna and Guy Ritchie's wedding at Skibo Castle was also a highlight, as was a London wedding on the top of the Shard overlooking the city’s skyline. Palazzo Pisani Moretta in Venice was very romantic; we created specialised lighting for the frontage of the building so guests arriving by gondola saw the venue lit from the canal.’ But aside from elaborate venues, Bartholomew assures that any location can be a special place for a wedding ceremony.
‘Wonderful woods also make great wedding venues. If the couple can build a floral arch and set benches for the guests to create a setting, any location can be transformed into a wedding venue. A meaningful local hotel restaurant or pub, for example, somewhere the couple go all the time, could also work well - though bear in mind fees for these can range quite far and wide, depending on the area.’ Bartholomew has organised weddings in some of the most show-stopping wedding venues in the world - but says there’s still plenty of unchartered territory for unique wedding ceremony venues. ‘I have so many ideas for unique and memorable weddings I'd love to work on. I recently discovered a countryside vineyard called Carver's Hill Estate in Wiltshire, where I'd love to arrange something. There's also a fort off the isle of Wight, No Mans Land Fort, with around 20 bedrooms and a Heli-pad, which can be used for weddings. In terms of places, I love working in Scotland; the atmosphere is always sensational.’
More unique wedding ceremony venue ideas
The list is endless, but with some guidance from Bartholomew, here are a few ideas.
A festival setting in woodland or a wildflower field
Breweries for those who enjoy a pint together
The grounds of a majestic castle
A vineyard (whether that’s UK, or abroad)
An art gallery
A historic library
Old theatres or music halls
A specialist museum reflecting the couple’s interests
A local farm for animal lovers
Whether you stick with tradition or wholly lean into these unique wedding ceremony ideas with a brand new order of service in an unusual setting, the beauty of modern wedding planning is there are no strict restrictions (aside from the initial legalities, of course). Kuyvenhoven’s final comment nods to the overarching theme in modern wedding ceremonies of couples creating a sense of inclusion on their special day - whether that’s through blessing the rings together or with a heartfelt ‘we do’ from guests to cement the bond not just between the couple, but the whole community. The celebrant concludes, ‘I believe that, no matter how personalised a wedding ceremony is, at its heart, it has always been and will be about two people who create a moment in which they commit to each other. At that moment, they promise to be there for each other, no matter what. Whatever the exact shape, tone and content of the ceremony, it is a rite of passage that unites people in a unique way, giving them a new status in their communities.’
